10 Steps to Sack Mediocrity and Boost Motivation

Being mediocre is akin to being the devil, at least it is to many people I know. Personally, I’ve never really been a perfectionist because I don’t believe in perfection, but I do believe in excellence. However, when you’re mediocre you’re neither here nor there, so what’s the point?

If you’re struggling with pushing yourself beyond mediocre and toward excellence here are a few tips:

1. Push yourself beyond the limits you’ve created for yourself. We all have our comfort zone, that place on the sofa that’s so cushy you never want to leave. It’s the place you’re at mentally that tells you to breeze through your work without really pushing yourself too hard. I challenge you – the next time you take on a project – whether a writing assignment, an assignment at work or cleaning your closet; take it a step further this time. Push yourself in the moment for more, forget about later, your goal is to create something spectacular now.

2. Avoid self-loathing. If you think you can’t, you most likely won’t. Catch the negativity and remind yourself of how far you’ve come instead, better yet have someone else remind you of what an amazing person you are. It’s o.k. to ask for some love, so reach out to someone you know cares about you.

3. Don’t get sucked into the gadget whirlpool. It’s hard to keep up with all the new technology out there. It’s expensive and overwhelming. Be selective of the gadgets you allow into your life, this will help avoid a scattered brain.

4. Uni-task. No, I’m not trying to get you fired. In fact, I’m trying to get you promoted. Multi-tasking breeds mediocre results, whether at work or at home. For example, how do you feel when you have several tabs open on your desktop, and you’re jotting down notes for research and you’re making phone calls, and updating your Facebook status on just how overwhelmed you are, and… and…and…well, you get my drift. Now, think about only having one tab open and focusing on a single task. Doesn’t that immediately relieve some stress? Not only will it relieve stress but it will also yield better results.

5. Sharpen your attention span. Guilty as charged. Sometimes it’s just hard to focus on one thing – especially if you’re mentally and physically exhausted (shout out to all those hard-working moms out there!), bouncing from one task/idea to another is just easier. Fix this by intentionally bringing yourself back to focus. Instead of online surfing, pick up an article of interest and read it in its entirely (gulp). Print it out if you have to, but make a habit of starting something and finishing it. Exercising your mind through reading, for instance, will help build an ability to focus beyond a few seconds.

6. Guard the company you keep. Your mama was right when she warned you about those kids. Spend too much time with them and you’ll fall into the same mess they’re in. On the other hand, hanging out with ambitious individuals will help push you out of your comfort zone, not out of jealously (at least not a spiteful one) but out of a knowledge there is something better out there and it can be yours too.

7. Be critical. Not in a put yourself down kind of way – but look at situations you find yourself in and decisions you have to make with a critical eye and not just a means for passive consumption.

8. Exercise (oh, and exercise some more). There is something about getting through a physically challenging exercise routine that strengthens your mind. Strong body=strong mind. Strengthen your body and you will immediately learn how to raise your standards in all aspects of your life.

9. Simplify your commitments. The more over-stretched you are the easier it is to let things of mediocre nature creep into your life, after all, you have no choice because your sanity depend on it! However, when you’re focused on a few important areas of you’re able to raise your standards without losing your mind.

10. Don’t give up on yourself. When all is said and done how we complete our tasks whether personally or professionally says a lot about who we are as individuals. It’s not easy pushing yourself off the coach and beyond the limits you’ve created for yourself, but when you commit to doing things right they will get better. Everyone makes mistakes, no one is perfect but there’s no room in either one of our lives for mediocre standards.

So what about you? What have you done lately to raise your standards? Have any suggestions? Share below!

Stop Waiting for Success

Go out and grab it.

If information overload has gotten to you, don’t worry you’re not alone. Post after post with advice on how to find what you’re looking for – success in your business, success in your personal life, success in your studies. You have advice coming out of your ears, and the worst part about it is you don’t know what to do with it.

Here’s a little trick I’ve applied lately, in an age of uber connectivity and consumption you might find it extreme, so brace yourself: stop consuming. Too much information is overwhelming and stressful, so narrow down the information you consume and start learning through experience.

Make Mistakes

Yes! In a world with information on how to do everything right, the bottom line is: you have to make mistakes to learn your trade, your craft, your subject.

Reading all the how-to posts and success stories is romantic. But in order to intimately learn your craft you have to see its ugly side, it’s wake up in the morning side. The only way to do this is by doing something, anything and being OK with making mistakes and embarrassing yourself.

You’re Cool, so Act Like It

No, I don’t mean transforming into someone who’s mean. However, it is essential to be choosy about who you’re hanging with and who you allow into your inner circle.

This applies to both your online and offline worlds.

This means narrowing down only the most important newsletters, email subscriptions you have flooding your inbox. There’s something about waking up to a full inbox akin to a messy kitchen, it just messes up your flow.

It also means narrowing down the number of people who are expending your energy. Negative energy out -in all forms- positive energy in. Use this philosophy in sifting all of your daily interactions. Sifting out negativity will help you inch toward your personal success.

Stop Waiting Around for Things to Happen

No one likes to think of themselves as lazy, who would? Laziness is ugly. So get moving!

If you’re waiting for things to start happening in your life, and you’re not taking action – you’ll wait around forever. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing – just do something!

Get up now – if you need a shower go take one, then:

* Polish up your resume
* Reconnect with your old co-workers
* Volunteer (part-time)
* Barter services with like-minded individuals
* Talk to people you see in real life
* Walk into a library and stroll the career development section

This are suggestions on what you can do immediately to get moving. Ideas and opportunities will begin to branch out from the actions you start taking. The more aggressive you are in your pursuits the more ideas you’ll come across, and hopefully, opportunities.

Taking Action is Powerful

There’s something about getting up and taking action that will give you a sense of empowerment. Challenge yourself today and do something to get you out of the rut. Success will not come to you, you have to go after it – chase it and conquer it. You will learn from your mistakes and you will get over your fears only through action.

Every Warrior of the Light has felt afraid of going into battle.
Paulo Coelho, Warrior of the Light

How have you stopped waiting and taken action? Success stories are awesome, so share below!

5 Paralyzing Factors Keeping You from Success

It’s that time of year again. You crossed off another square peg on your calendar, and realized just how quickly yet another New Year is approaching. Yep, that time of year when you face resolutions you’ve met – or not met – head on. Yet another year you promise yourself you’ll do better this time around; you’ll finally work on that special project, mend that broken relationship, start that business or lose those extra pounds. It’s that time of year when you evaluate where you’ve been, where you are and where you’re going.

How’s it working out for you?

If you’re like many, you might be feeling stuck. You know you want to move forward, but you’re not exactly sure how or why?

5 paralyzing factors keeping you from success:

1. Your mind is cluttered. When your mind is messy, it’s pretty hard to get anything accomplished. Organize your thoughts by prioritizing your time. When you allocate time for specific tasks – your mind is not constantly wandering. Training your mind to focus without excessive thoughts cluttering your thought-space is freeing. Granted, it takes practice, but once mastered everything becomes clearer.

“Clear thoughts produce clear results.” – Remez Sasson

2. You simply don’t know what to do. Sometimes, you may have a goal in mind but have no clue where to start. In this case, get help. Find someone who has already done what you want to achieve, and reach out. Getting the right help and direction will allow you to channel your energy positively instead of drowning in self-pity.

“Mentor: Someone whose hindsight can become your foresight.” -Ancient Chinese proverb

3. The pieces just don’t fit. If you’ve ever caught yourself thinking, ‘I don’t have what it takes’, or ‘I wasn’t born into it – so I don’t belong’, you are chipping away at your success. Stop it. Instead, acknowledge whatever it is you don’t have, work on it, and move on.

“If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.” -Henry Ford

4. You’re learning but not doing. This is a tough one for me! There is so much great information out there, but all the self-help books, articles and blog posts will do nothing for you if you’re not implementing what you’re learning. Just think about it, of all the information and creative tid-bits you’re consuming, how much of it are you really implementing in your work or life? Go out and do – learn through trial and error.

“An idea not coupled with action will never get any bigger than the brain cell it occupied.” -Arnold Glasow

5. You think you don’t have self-discipline. Ah, alas, contrary to the popular belief that ‘some people have it and others don’t', self-discipline is a habit. A habit that is often the breaking point between success and failure. Just like any other habit, it needs a plan to implement, execute and sustain.

“The first and best victory is to conquer self.” -Plato

What was holding you back and how did you conquer it? Inspire others by sharing below!

Photo courtesy of Flickr.

“The Art of Influence” – Chris Widener

If you’re in marketing, marketing your business, your brand, or yourself you may have heard of a nifty little book, “The Art of Influence”, by Chris Widener. It’s a parable of a young MBA graduate who is just starting out his post-graduate journey. As a gift, his grandmother gives him the weekend under the wing of a billionaire (yes, grandma’s nanny years and connections come in very handy!).

Marcus Drake (recent grad) and Bobby Gold (billionaire) begin their lesson-filled weekend on figuring out the difference between persuasion vs. influence.

Persuasion vs. Influence

The book draws a clear distinction between persuasion and influence from the start.

Persuasion is based on using technique, such as compelling presentations and winning arguments in order to move people to action.

Influence, on the other hand, is different not because you don’t want people to take action (in business and life, of course you do), it’s about having a deeper impact than just a momentary call to action. Influence is how you control yourself propelling action, not a momentary action but one that is repeated time and again.

“The kind of person you are is what determines your influence, which, in turn, is what determines your success.”

When you are on a mission to persuade only, you may get a one time deal or a one time buy. However, an influential person is much more powerful. An influential person changes someone’s thoughts, thus, impacting action. Sounds pretty hypnotic, doesn’t it? Wish you had that kind of influence on others? Well, according to ‘Bobby Gold’, the only way to influence others is by first changing yourself.

“You can’t decide if you are going to be a leader. You can only decide if you will become the type of person others want to follow.”

Becoming a Person of Influence

‘Bobby Gold’ goes on to explain that we don’t really control our experiences, nor our initial circumstances as well – but, we can control how we react to these experiences. The reaction phase, how people deal with their experiences is what separates the leaders from non-leaders.

Choose to work hard and get better = leader
Choose to sit idle and let things stay the same or get worse = non-leader

The essential message here is that bad things happen to everyone, how one chooses to react to these situations is what will determine the kind of person you become. [Assuming, of course, the circumstance for change is ripe.]

“There are those who make a significant impact, and those who don’t. There are those who design their lives and live them exactly as they choose, and those who drift aimlessly through life, allowing others to choose for them.”

Which one are you?

“Golden Rules of Influence”

Golden Rule of Influence #1: “Live a life of undivided integrity”.

There is so much to be said about integrity, but it boils down to one word: trust. If people don’t trust you, they don’t want to be around you and they certainly will not buy your product or service. After all, how do they know you’re not ripping them off? Build your foundation for life and business on honesty, and know that you have the best start possible.

Golden Rule of Influence # 2: “Always Demonstrate a Positive Attitude”.

Who doesn’t want to be around a ray of sunshine all the time? Sarcasm aside, it really does take a lot of effort to stay positive in difficult situations. However, staying positive is a powerful attribute and not everyone can do it; which is why those who can are effective leaders.

When you choose to stay positive you are ultimately

“choosing to see the world in a positive way. You are choosing to believe that something good can come from negative circumstances and that the future will be better than the present. That’s the kind of attitude people want to follow.”

Golden Rule of Influence # 3: “Consider Other People’s Interests as More Important than Your Own”.

It’s pretty easy to think of all the things you want, it’s a little harder to think outside of yourself and consider others. However, when you’re able to move beyond yourself and genuinely consider other peoples interests you have a new scope of insight to work with. Try it.

Golden Rule of Influence #4: “Dont Settle for Anything Less than Excellence”.

Anyone can pursue mediocrity, it is the few who pursue excellence. It takes a ridiculous amount of effort to be excellent and those who are self-disciplined enough and go after excellence will find that people are naturally attracted to their positivity.

“…I have based my life and work around seven areas of excellence: physical appearance, emotional health, intellectual growth, spiritual depth, relationships, financial success, and charitable giving.”

These may all seem common sense places to invest yourself in, but let’s be honest, you may have forgotten about a few. Intellectual growth is one of my favorites;

“…so keep hitting the books. The competition won’t be, and you will see the difference.”

Too often, people put reading on the back burner (it’s hard to read when you have 20 million other things to do!), but if you’re in a competitive field, or if you just want to revolutionize your life, read!

This has been a particularly long review, I know – but if you’re interested in grasping influence, what is mentioned here is only a fraction of the useful nuggets you’ll find in this easy-to-read, yet essential little book.

Photo via Dreamstime

3 Easy Steps to Claim Success in Your Life

Empower yourself, don't wait for anyone else to do it for you.

Imagine sitting on the sidelines of your favorite sports game. You’re watching intently, thinking about what the players could have done better, which players to put in and which ones to take out. You’re enthusiastically making the moves in your head and taking note of everything your eyes can see. This all seems very exciting and you feel yourself getting pumped. The only problem is – it’s all going down in your head. All of the action, all of your moves, interpretations are not materializing because you’re the only one who even knows about all of this exciting movement.

Bummer. Because if anyone took notice, they’ll realize you have a lot to offer.

Here’s the thing: You Have the Power to Create Change. Change in your life, in your career, in your success. You have the power to transform a negative into a positive and drive your life forward with the same enthusiasm you use often, silently, in your own mind.

1. Share Your Brilliance

Staying silent will get you no where. Granted, speaking too much can get you no where too, but striking a balance can take you everywhere. Learning when to say something at the right time can be gold. This can help prevent regret (ever thought to yourself, ‘I should have stood up for myself’, ‘I should have introduced myself to so and so’, and the list goes on).

Saying (the right) something at the right time to the right person can present unexpected opportunity. If you’re trying to expand your business, but you’re kinda on the shy side, you’re going to learn that getting over your fears is essential to your success. Who ever thought that friend of a friend had a need for your product or service? You’ll never know if you don’t try.

2. When You Feel Embarrassed, Shake it off

Everyone has moments when they wish they can disappear, melt away. It happens to everyone, know why? Because everyone is human and everyone makes mistakes. Think of the person you admire most. Now, imagine this person in their finest moment and note to yourself that even this person has messed up a few times; even this person has had embarrassing moments they’ve overcome.

3. Resolve to Succeed

The biggest obstacle to success is not lack of funding, not inexperience or any external circumstance, but yourself. Yes, YOU are your biggest problem. Take responsibility for yourself, your actions and most importantly what you’ve been saying to yourself.

If you say you’re not good enough, you won’t be good enough.

If you say you are good enough, you will be good enough.

It’s as simple as that. When you believe in yourself you’ll find a way to get the experience, you’ll find a way to invest in yourself and your future.

So, what are you waiting for? Get going and start building that better future you’ve been waiting for, no time like the present. Oh, wait, before you go – share your success tips below, how do you push yourself forward when you’re feeling stuck?

And…just one more thing, if you enjoyed this post, share it with your friends!

What Does Productivity Really Mean?

Is it only about getting things done?

This is the time to get ahead. The speculators will speculate, the pundits will tell you the economy is weak but for those with drive and determination, there is hardly a down time.

While it may be your time to get ahead, it also means the pressure is on, like full-blast. It is a race between wills. Who will work the hardest, who will take it to the next level? Who will face their fears, their competitors, but most dauntingly – who will face their own self-doubt?

This is the time to switch gears, from procrastination to productivity, but what does being productive really mean? Since productivity is derived from productive, let’s take a look at exactly what productive means. According to Merriam-Webster “productive” \prə-ˈdək-tiv\ means:

: having the quality or power of producing especially in abundance

Therefore, “productivity” \prō-dək-ˈti-və-tē\ means:

: the quality or state of being productive

So, what does productivity mean to you? Interestingly enough, I recently came across this question on the ProductiveMuslim Facebook page [aside: you don't have to be Muslim to answer ), which really made me think about productivity in my life. I consider myself a productive individual, maybe not so much in the conventional sense of getting the most things done in the shortest amount of time, but productive non-the-less.

Being productive is more than just checking off a to-do list, it is about acknowledging your personal goals and taking the steps needed to fulfill these goals. It’s about reminding yourself of the bigger picture, and what you’re doing on a daily basis to stay in tune with your own “bigger picture”.

Being original at one point was all the rage until people realized that originality is dead. Afterall, this is the 21st century, just think of all the people who’ve lived before you. Part of being productive is acknowledging the fact that you may not be so original because everything has already been said and done, well, almost anyway, but you’ll keep going regardless. The only certified way to be original is to bring your own perspective to surface. No one has lived your life hour to hour, minute to minute, second to the second. This, my friend, makes you unique.

Your experiences, your thoughts, your insight makes you different from the billions of others who’ve traveled this journey before you. Be inspired.

Being productive is not about getting the maximum amount of tasks done in the minimum amount of time, it’s about shaping your legacy while you still have to power to do so. It’s about taking control of your life, your business, your message.

What does productivity mean in your life?

Photo courtesy of Flickr

5 Steps to Inspire Creativity

What Inspires Your Creativity?

Contrary to popular belief, it takes self-discipline and hard work to find your creative muse, very rarely does it just happen. Here are 5 steps, in no particular order, that have helped me get over self-doubt and apathy toward creative experiences.

1. Capture Your Best Ideas – Wherever You Are

My best thoughts for a blog post, an article or project I’m working on seem to creep into my mind right when I’m about to pass through the threshold between wakefulness and sleep. It’s the pen and paper stationed securely on my night table which ensures these thoughts are not pushed to the back of my mind. Figure out where/when you’re most likely to have your inspiring thoughts and make sure you’re ready for them when they come.

2. Don’t be Afraid of Judgement

Some people will not like what you have to offer. Creativity is subjective and when you get over your fear of being judged you will automatically break through boundries that have been holding you back.

“Sometimes you’ve got to let everything go- purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything…whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you’ll find that when you’re free, your true creativity, your true self comes out.” – Tina Turner

3. Listen to the Conversations You have with Yourself

Your best ideas are lurking somewhere within, find them.

4. Surround Yourself with Brilliance

When you’re around people who are doing extraordinary things on many different levels you have no choice but to be great.

“Tell me what company you keep and I’ll tell you what you are.” – Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

5. Expose Yourself to New Experiences

When you experience a new place, read a book of an unfamiliar genre or meet new people you are taken to a different realm within your existence. Constantly exposing yourself to new experiences will continuously give you fresh ideas, some may inspire, others may disappoint but it’s your responsibility to pursue new endeavors to keep your mind awake and hopefully inspire the creative genius within.

There are so many ways to inspire creativity, what works best for you?

3 Reasons Why You Watched the Desperate Housewives of NJ Premiere

The Real Desperate Housewives of NJ - BRAVO TV

There are bigger things going on in the world. Serious issues, world hunger, the occupation of Palestine, the recovering economy, the IMF scandal and you wouldn’t be wasting a perfectly good Monday night watching the premiere of a modern Italian-American melodrama enfold…but you did. Its o.k., don’t feel bad because you’re not alone.

I can’t resist the urge of a perfectly good reality show, especially when it involves family feuds, a few brawls and some name calling (eh, maybe it’s the Philly in me). There is something about the show that calls out to millions of Americans. It could be the elaborate lifestyles these families live (symbolizing the American Dream of material wealth); it could be the dysfunctional family ties that exist (echoing some unresolved issues in our own personal lives) or, it could be the fact that true friends are hard to come across (more of a reason to cherish those you know will have your back when times are tough)?

1. The American Dream

Every American wants to believe the American Dream is still alive. When you see someone living in a plush home, with fancy cars and lots of bling – paid for by lots of hard work, it gives hope. It is the hope that if you work hard enough, you can have that too. It’s all within your reach if you just work a little more and keep the fire in your belly ignited. This is especially relevant in a recovering economy when people are struggling, inflation is raising and people are tired. This hope maintains sanity.

2. Dysfunctional Families

Know any? Whether you know of such from afar or maybe you belong to one, you’ve probably experienced too all the drama such a family entails. Are you obligated to love someone because they are from the same mother, father, or just because they have the same last name? Is that the criteria for “family”? No, it’s not. Family is more than just blood. Family is about shared experiences, it’s about loving each other unconditionally regardless of mistakes, failures or successes. It’s about knowing you will always be a cherished member of a super special social network. If this doesn’t exist than having this sense of empty loyalty is an unnecessary burden.

3. Best Friends Forever!

Going through the drama of a dysfunctional family makes having a special group of friends around even more important. This is why when Teresa says that Jaqueline and Caroline are her “family”, she means it. She means that these are her girls, they may not have the same blood line but they have her back when times get tough and she can count on them. It’s a pretty nice feeling, and this is what family is all about.

So go ahead, tell your co-workers you watched the premiere of the Desperate Housewives of NJ. Yes, you know there are bigger things going on in the world but you can also tell them there are deeper things going on here too!

Did I leave something out? Why do you think millions of Americans are addicted to reality TV?

Unique Skills and Finding YOUR Path

Take aim and shoot for success

“Let him that would move the world, first move himself.” -Socrates

I wish someone would have asked me what my unique skill was when I was leaving high school and entering college. Answering this question could have saved me a lot of time and energy thinking about what I wanted to do with my life. Finding your unique skill early on can help carve your path in life (minus the tormenting lulls many people -myself included- experience). Even if you’re a little older (ahemm), discovering your unique skill can put you back on track if you’ve been looking for direction.

Using Your Unique Skills will Speak to Your Happiness

You know you’ve tapped into your unique skill when you feel a euphoria, extreme happiness, a joy for life when you’re doing it. I’ve always experienced a sense of relief when I put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard). Writing has been a purging system for me throughout the years. Whenever I found myself in a tough spot, I turned to writing as a a means of figuring things out. It was always easier to write the words down than to speak them out loud. In the end, writing has been my saving grace.

What’s Your Unique Skill?

Have a seat, think about it. Are you tapping into the passion, skill or natural talent that speaks directly to you? Are you waking up with purpose every morning, happy to be alive or are you dreading the thought of getting up in the morning? If you’re feeling the later, there are several things to consider.

What the Hell is Going On?

Ask yourself this question and answer yourself honestly. It’s easy to get caught up with the realities of survival, heck, everyone has to pay the rent and put food on the table. Granted, there are very real reasons why you’ve put your dreams on hold, but is it really worth it? Is all of this empty motion worth feeling a constant nagging of being something less than what you’re meant to be? Probably not.

What to Do – For Those Who’ve Lost the Way over the Years

Life is a process. For those of us fortunate enough to be physically and emotionally capable of going after our dreams, we should not hold back. Have an honest conversation with yourself. Whatever your reality is, you probably have some kind of responsibility to take care of – you still have to pay your rent/mortgage, but you can take baby steps toward your dream – toward fulfilling your unique skill. When having such a conversation, think about what you would do without the influence or pressures of your environment. Think in raw emotion and tap into the person you may have lost touch with many years ago.

Stay true to yourself. Your circumstances, culture and environment may impact how you live your life. Stay true to yourself and watch as your passion guides your decisions and will help you overcome external factors. Ignoring your true self inevitably translates into regret.

Start small. Do something small everyday that will take you closer to your dream until you’re confident enough in taking bigger steps, or leaps, toward your goal. Your life will probably not change over night. Hold yourself accountable for the discipline, consistency and patience you implement on your journey, and you will eventually get there (wherever ‘there’ is for you).

What to do – For those who are just starting their Journey (Congrats 2011 Grads!)

Spring is a happy time. The weather is warming up, the layers of clothing are coming off and it’s graduation season. If you’re about to go into the world, do yourself a favor – think about your unique skill. Doing this early on can help prevent confusion and a strong sense of loss when you’re going through your studies. If you’re able to pinpoint exactly you want to do with yourself -your life- you can spend your time in college sharpening the skills you need to succeed instead of constantly worrying about what it is you’ll be doing in ‘the real world’. Don’t wait for the real world to come your way, instead, create your reality.

The Bottom Line

Whatever you decide to do, let your unique skill guide you and while you’re at it, invest your entire being. When you invest yourself sincerely and bring your most authentic self to the table, no matter what your goal is, you will be successful.

Photo via Anna Chelnokova

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Why it’s Important to Stand up to the Cool Kids – Even as an Adult

Stand up for what you believe

 

“Apathy is the glove in which evil slips its hand.” -Bodie Thoene

Bullies pretty much suck.  They are aggressive, they’re out to hurt in any way they can and in the adult world they think they can stop you in your tracks.  Oh please, that’s so high school.

Too often, the adult world is full of bullies who think they can dominate.  The “cool kids” hang out, watch out for each other and can often be loud and obnoxious (oh, and please don’t offend the prom queen).  There is also the “quiet” group. This is the group that avoids confrontation and steers away from other crowds of kids.  There are “independents” that get along with all groups; who can easily shift between the cool crowd and the quieter group.  This may sound familiar and as bullying doesn’t just happen in adolescence, it also doesn’t disappear in adulthood. 

In the work place, in cyberspace and at your child’s school there are instances where adults seem to just drift to one another.  Adults form cliques too, which is not necessarily the problem.  It’s essential to have a support system in your life, but when you infringe on someone else’s opinion by implementing yours, than it becomes an issue.  It becomes an issue when someone states an opinion and people respond not in a conversational manner where you agree to disagree but simply to patronize.

In a world that teaches you to pick your battles, how do you choose?

Sometimes, you just know if you don’t say something you’ll regret it.  This is how you know.  It’s empowering and freeing to speak your mind.  After all, this is a luxury many across the world are literally dying to achieve. 

What if the words don’t come out right?

It happens to me all the time, but more often than not, I never regret taking a stand as opposed to letting things slide just because I’m afraid of coming off as a weak orator. 

Are you afraid of repercussions? 

Think about your worst case scenario.  Will people think foolishly of you?  Will you be ‘black-listed’?  Well, they can try.  People will form opinions, they will speak what they want but YOU know who you are.  Your clients know your professional standards and your friends know you give every situation 120%. 

What if you’ve made a mistake?

You’re only human and it will happen, probably a lot.  It’s important to note when you’ve made a mistake – deal with it, learn from it, get over it and move on.  There are too many things to get done to dwell on a single mistake.  Recognize that you give a situation power.  When you allow it to take over your system, you’ve giving it way to much power.  Let it go and feel how empowering this notion can be in your life.

Photo via The Kozy Shack